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aureat:

I hope you all find someone who gives you cute names and tells you it’s adorable when you do embarrassing things and hugs you when it’s early in the morning and makes you feel like you have a whole disneyland fireworks show going off inside your body and never ever lets you go 

did-you-kno:

A Chinese noodle vendor was caught selling opium-laced noodles when a customer who was at a routine traffic stop was given a urine test, which tested positive for opiates.    Source

did-you-kno:

A Chinese noodle vendor was caught selling opium-laced noodles when a customer who was at a routine traffic stop was given a urine test, which tested positive for opiates. Source

live-as-a-teen:

dogepom:

patickstump:

if you shame girls about their breast size i will push you into traffic

"Who’s flat now?"

whos flat now

twerk-like-dirk:

the-winchester-initiative:

deweydrops:

unscrupulousneckpunch:

buymyshirtsyo:

tastefullyoffensive:

How chicks put on lipstick [via]


I cant stop seeing the beaks as mouths so all of them are justD:

I THOUGHT THESE WERE GRAPES

why would grapes need to put on lipstick?

to feel beautiful

twerk-like-dirk:

the-winchester-initiative:

deweydrops:

unscrupulousneckpunch:

buymyshirtsyo:

tastefullyoffensive:

How chicks put on lipstick [via]

I cant stop seeing the beaks as mouths so all of them are just
D:

I THOUGHT THESE WERE GRAPES

why would grapes need to put on lipstick?

to feel beautiful

stability:

precumming:

I want kids so bad

so go to a playground and take one stupid where do u think kids come from

i can’t believe that tomorrow is the 1st of halloween

  • me: *kicks down your door*
  • me: HEY DID YOU HEAR ALL TIME LOW IS RECORDING A NEW ALBUM

lovefromtwiggs:

Friendly reminder that the man who wrote Let it Go and other lovely songs from Frozen also wrote the beautiful songs entitled:

The Internet is For Porn
Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist 
Spooky Mormon Hell Dream 
Everything Comes Down to Poo
If You Were Gay 
I Am Africa
Hasa Diga Eebowai

patrickthomson:


this is your periodic reminder that old-timey medicines did not fuck around

patrickthomson:

this is your periodic reminder that old-timey medicines did not fuck around

  • me: i am actually so happy with my life right now for once
  • next day: *everything fucks up*

"My talents include sleeping and pretending that I’m doing okay."

- “10 word story" series - #73 (via unpoeticheartbreak)